How to waste $800.00

Step 1. This is one of the funniest bicycle ads to ever grace (disgrace) the pages of ebay:



"I was a former bike courier and a former track racer so I'm very picky about what I ride. To say that this bike is the perfect street cruiser is a gross understatement. The greatest thing about single speed bikes is that they are simple, slick, and beautiful, but never in my wildest dreams did I think they had them in full-suspension. This bike is as durable as it is beautiful. You can ride it, you can jump it, and you can even swim with it. There are hardly any moving parts or wires, so there's nothing to maintain or take care of. All you need to do is use it, abuse it, and park it. This model is not new, but not available in the US or Europe either.The one shown in the picture is fully assembled, but the one you are bidding on will arrive at your door steps brand new still in it's original packaging. This item is also available in Red and Yellow with matching tires. Some "very minor" assembly is required, but nothing you need mechanics for. The bike has a universal one size that will fits all frame. Adjustments with the seat and seat pole will allow it to fit just about anyone. If you are tall like me (6 foot 2 inches), you will need to get an extended seat pole, but the frame will fit and you will have a very comfortable ride. The bike comes with a 39 x 16 gear ratio. The rear silver pegs on the bike pictured are not standard, and will cost $10.00 extra and available upon request after purchase. This is the first time I'm actually selling on Ebay, so I hope I have been through enough, but please feel free to ask me any questions. Thanks you."

You can even swim with it? I think we've all been through enough... thanks you.

Go HERE if you want to see the actual page... but come back.

Step 2. Let me know what you think of this bike in the "comments" section.

Step 3. Once you have stopped laughing it will be time to get down to business... that's right: Business Time...



I might just have to dust off the ol' guitar and learn that one... to serenade my wife with.

Oh yeah, riding: I am back to training and in the past two days I've been doing back, to back, to back, to back hard interval rides... my bike wants more... but I'm quite sleepy.

Guest Blogger: Jason Lowetz

15 minutes till race start:

Deciding whether I was going to use both legs or just one leg in todays race quickly became the least of my worries.

There is a sound that is made by the air exiting your tubular tire which is filled with tufo sealant. That sound is accompanied by a magnificent pinwheel spray effect of tufo sealant....if you are moving.

14 minutes till race start:

2 blocks away a pair of rolf wheels sat quietly at home wishing that they could be in the bicycle race going on across the way. One of them was about to get there wish. It would be the front.

I made the phone call. Brother Dan, owner of the rolf wheels, and we made our way to his home. 2 blocks away. Home of the rolf wheels. We replaced the front wheel. I was off. I could have swore I heard the rolf rear wheel mutter something like " see ya in a few minutes..... bitch"... ....but naaaa. Wheels dont talk.

10 minutes till race start:

There is a sound that is made by the air exiting your tubular tire which is filled with tufo sealant. That sound is accompanied by a magnificent pinwheel spray effect of tufo sealant....if you are moving.

Yup.....the rear just went.

Back to the house to get the rear wheel. When I got to the house the wheel was waiting by the door and it was wearing a g-string. The weirdest thing I had seen today for sure. Anyway.....Brother Dan and I raced to swap the cassette and put the wheel on.

5 minutes until race start:

Ready to go.

0 minutes to go until race start:

Race starts.

PAA riders everywhere.

The plan. Victory.

Grayson was to be my leadout man. Others were to be busy bees. I sat in and watched the bees work there bee asses off for 53 minutes. Chasing breaks, keeping the pace up, and what not.

With 3 or 4 laps to go I found Graysons wheel and watched the race play out. I briefly lost his wheel with just over 1 to go. No worries though. I simply punched a few opponents in the face and regained my position.

Just under 1 lap to go. Trouble. Grayson is out front and I am second wheel. Mucho too soon for this. Just as we are about to be swarmed by the bad guys on the backside straightaway, Claudio goes zipping by on the left. I'm pretty sure his jersey had ripped off from the acceleration. This ends up working out well as Grayson hit the gas and kept us near the front. We were top 10 coming out of corner 4. I was glued to Graysons wheel ready to hit the turbo blaster button. With about 100 yards to the finish I hit the turbo blaster button. A few seconds late. I finished 3rd. I was gaining on the 2 fellas in front of me, but not much. If I would have used both legs and If Grayson would have taken 1 more flinstone vitamin this morning we would have taken it for sure.

Nice work yall.Sorry I missed the podium. I was busy doing one armed push-ups on top of the black pearl.

-Jaysus

B. Harlan

P6230044.jpg, originally uploaded by jasonsager.

This is an excerp from Blake Harlans blog. It is definately a gem of the blogging world (in my book, anyway), and I couldn't agree more. It was one of those times when you read something and think "Holy Shit... I'm not the only one!".

Anyway, Blake's blog is pretty interesting right now so check it out. Now here is a preview:

"Yesterdays effort left me with mixed emotions. Out of the 50 or 60 guys that lined up on the start line, 28 of them finished in front of me. The race was long, dusty, hot and needless to say really really hard. I paced myself almost to perfection for the 4 lap 2 hours and 45 minute ordeal but that just wasn't really good enough, or was it? I was great that i ran my body to the max, felt good about my effort, raced smart and better yet didn't crack. However, with all that said, thinking i couldn't have gone any faster, i still finished 29th. Maybe everyone else was just having a killer day but i highly doubt it. I think this is just a wake up call that even though i wake up and train everyday, pretty much without much thought to the weather, its still going to take some time to be up there with the big boys. Weather its just more time i need, or maybe I'm just waiting for something between my bike and my body to click. While it might seem like a bad thing to feel, I have found it unusually hard to watch those around me continue to excel. Almost like I'm getting left behind. Its not that I'm really that jealous of them but more frustrated as to why i can't be doing the same. But if its one thing i have learned during this whole bike racing lifestyle, its that everyone excels at their own speed. One day I'll be in the pro ranks bump'n elbows, but I'll just have to wait a little longer."

Damn... cycling is so bittersweet sometimes.

Me, Brooke, Jesse and Bear Divide... Lazy Days.

On Fri Brooke, Jesse Scarantino (who will be hosting some incredible Tour de France parties in July. I will post the link for those who live in the LA area.) and I rode up to Bear Divide.

It was hotter than camel piss.

I can definitely say that is the hardest I've ridden since getting sick... I was worked on sat and took it easy.

Sun (today) I will see how my legs feel and maybe do a pretty hard ride again.

Alex stopped by this morning and gave a little demo on the correct posture for riding a single-speed.

On a completely unrelated note: Brooke's single-speed is almost fully operational.

B-Day!

Today was Brooke's birthday! We went for a ride and even though it was easy I got tired, ha, ha! I am going to try a harder ride tomorrow... I think.
I am also going to get some pictures up on the blog soon, I am having "technical difficulties"
Got this one up though, so this one's for you Alex:

Since I haven't been riding as much I have had time for a few other things and I can honestly say that my road bike hasn't been this clean since I first built it.
Look for a race report from guest blogger Jason Lowetz soon too.
Peace out.

A 1 month absence...

After taking a month off from pretty much the whole human race, I am now officially back (strange since I was never officially gone...).
My absence kicked off with pneumonia, and I will kick off this return to blogging with the story of my 3rd time back on the bike since I fell down under the weather.
After not having ridden for what seemed like an eternity of coughing, antibiotics and sleeping in, I was forced into action by the Park City, Utah (Deer Valley) leg of the NORBA national tour.
Brooke and I had planned a trip that included camping on Gooseberry mesa and partaking in what may be the best riding ever!
We packed our bags and our bikes and set out for UT!
When we arrived at Gooseberry we found a nice spot to camp and made a fire, roasted hot-dogs and laid our bags down under the stars to sleep.
The next day (day #1 back on the bike) we cris-crossed all over the mesa, riding: Hidden Canyon, the South Rim, the White Trail, the Yellow Trail (in both directions) the North rim and the Practice loop.
After several hours in the 100+ degree heat we were running out of time and we were wilting so we packed up the car and headed up to Park city to stay with our friend Megan and her dog Annie.
We got in later that expected because A: we underestimated the time it would take to finish the drive from Gooseberry and B: we forgot about the time change. Ooops, sorry Megan!
The next morning (day #2) we drove the 15 min. to Deer Valley and pre-rode the course, stopping in at the Fisher tent afterwards to say our hello's to the team.
After that it was back to Megan's for some grub. We had a great time grilling up salmon and making pasta and salad, watched a movie, had a bit of ice cream and went to bed.
Day #3 back on the bike was race day and after examining my performance on days 1 and 2 I was determined to at least finish all 4 laps!
The race started with about 60 riders and I went as fast as I could, mingling somewhere near the mid-back of the group.
Lap one was my best lap... I faded a lot on lap 2 and had to stop and take a break. Only one or two riders passed me while I was resting.
Lap 3 I was starting to get light headed and I was having trouble holding my lines... I was thinking about quitting... a bee flew into my jersey and started biting me multiple times...
When I entered the feed zone at the beginning of lap 4 I took a nice long break, and started feeling better. I decided that I wasn't going to quit with 1 lap to go.
Oh yeah, I had gotten a flat on lap 1 that had mostly sealed with Stan's but there was still a slow leak and it had gone flat 2 times. I had just been re-filling it with C02.
While on the last climb of the last lap of the race it REALLY went flat... the C02 and Stan's were just spittin' out and midway through the last descent I emptied a can of Seal-Flate into the tire, hoping it would gum up enough to last me the 2 min I needed to finish.
No dice though, and 2 riders passed me while I was running my bike to the finish line for 46th place.
Anyway, 4 dizzy laps, 34 miles, 3 flat tires, multiple rest breaks and bee stings later, I felt like I had accomplished something just finishing!
Since I triple flatted in AZ for NORBA #1 and had no drops I pretty much had to race in UT this week. Unfortunately for me I only got 34 points for my miserable 46th place finish so that will definately put a dent in my overall standings.
Oh well, it's better than a zero I guess, and I got to have a fun trip with my wife and ride Gooseberry Mesa.
The next day was Brookes race, she did awesome and got 3rd place in a big, competitive field.
Alex, also feeling a little under the weather, hung onto 6th place in his race. Dave Roth got a 6th place in Super D and Cheryl Roth got on the podium with a 5th place finish despite a tough battle against local high-altitude junkies!
The day after that was my Short Track race. My cousin Ann was visiting a friend in SLC and came out to the race even though I warned her that if the XC was any indication I would be getting pulled pretty damn quickly!
I warmed up and went to the line, waited, and got a nice call up in 3rd place.
The race started... I went fast (felt fast, actually slow)... I got passed by everyone... I passed a few people back...
I was saved by the bell on lap 3 when Frosty pulled me. I have never been so relieved to be done with a race in my life!
After that it was just a fun time cheering on Willow and Heather in the Pro race, more grilling with my cousin Anne, Megan, her friend Wade and a cornucopia of dogs, and then a long drive home!